10 pounds heavier and finding my true strength

 

 

As someone who deliberately put on weight (10 pounds) during the start of my powerlifting journey, and kept it on for a good two years, I grew to appreciate my body and the things it could do, in a whole new, liberating, empowering way.

 

After completing that journey, (I’m not done with powerlifting, just on a break) I then decided to take the ten pounds off.

 

 I’ll be completely honest.

 

1. My clothes weren’t fitting the way they used to and that makes me down right cranky.

 

2. I like being slightly leaner. Can’t tell you why specifically. (Nor should I have to. I’ll do me. You do you.) I just do.

 

3. As a woman who just turned 44 and may, or may not be, in perimenopause (I like to think I’m not, and that my really hot body temp is just normal, right? I mean, it’s warm in here, right?) I know that I will inevitably get to a stage in my life where it may be much harder to lose those extra pounds. For health reasons, I’d like to go into that phase of my life (Which I tell myself is very FAR off) with the best advantage possible.

 

Some of my reasons I’ve listed above have to do with vanity. Some of them have to do with practicality and budget (I was not going to buy a new wardrobe when I already owned so many beautiful things that fit.) And some have to do with long term health.

 

 

And NONE of these reasons are wrong or negative to myself as a person.

 

In our industry there are a LOT of women coming to (sometimes angry) terms with the reality that we are pressured from many angles to be thin and to associate our weight and our appearance with worth only if we possess one single aesthetic type. It’s pretty infuriating when you first absorb the totality of it and it sure pissed me off for a long while. I went through this in depth process a couple years ago and I would imagine I lost a lot of facebook friends because it was pretty much ALL I posted about for quite some time.

 

As a woman, that experience was necessary and important for me. I can also tell you it was pretty damn cathartic. I would do it again in a heartbeat. It thrills me to see other women going through the same journey.

 

But now that I’ve processed it all, I’ve come full circle. I’m at peace. I get it. I’m happy. I have found my true power as a woman and as an individual. 

 

And unlike the past couple years, as I have healed, found acceptance, and caught up with myself, I am no longer bitter, mad at the world or mad at myself.

 

But here is what I’ve also learned now that I’m out on the other end.

 

We have wars of fat shaming, fitness shaming, and body acceptance, all battling one another. The thing is, on some level, they are ALL correct.

 

There can be a balance.

 

The first thing we need to do is step back and honor everyone’s unique experiences and ways of processing and THEIR journey. Just as our workouts should be unique and tailored to us as individuals, and our food plans and diet plans should be made for us specifically, so will our journey’s be entirely different.

 

Our reasons and motivations for who we want to be and why, will also differ, and they will likely shift and change as we do.

 

Do you want abs? Just always wanted to rock a leaner midsection? Go get them. With a vengeance. Vain? So what.

 

Do you want to take time to learn to love your body exactly as it is and not focus on weight loss? Maybe you even want to gain weight and explore some other element that has scared you before. Dive in deep and do it.

 

Do you want to go to your 30 year reunion 15 pounds lighter just because it will make you feel good? Go AFTER that.

 

Do you want to improve your fitness levels and lose weight to be healthier? To offset recent health problems? Admirable and necessary.

 

We should all be supportive of one another’s goals and choices, not judge them, (maybe question them for insight and understanding), and remember that “it all depends.”

 

 Where I was five years ago, two years ago, today? Entirely different and all part of my process. I’ve gone through many phases on my journey to discover what fitness is for me.

 

None of them were wrong.

 

Jeannine Trimboli,

 

Founder, real [FIT] life

 

www.realfitlife.net

 

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www.realfitlife.net